We had a breakup. She calls me sometimes when she needs something from me. It's her birthday next week. Should I wish her a happy birthday or not?

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This is a tricky situation, and the best course of action depends on a few factors:

How amicable was the breakup? If it was a messy, painful split, then wishing her happy birthday might reopen wounds or create unwanted expectations. If it was a mutual, respectful separation, it could be a kind gesture.
What are your intentions? Are you hoping to get back together? If so, a birthday wish might be interpreted as a sign of interest. Be honest with yourself about what you want.
How do you feel about her calls for help? If you feel used or resentful, then wishing her happy birthday might reinforce that dynamic.
What do you want the future of your relationship to look like? Is it better to cut all contact to move on, or would you like to maintain some level of friendship?

Here are a few possible scenarios and corresponding actions:

Scenario 1: Messy breakup, you feel used by her calls, and you want to move on completely. Action: Don't wish her happy birthday. Maintaining distance is probably best.
Scenario 2: Amicable breakup, you're okay with her occasional requests, and you'd like to remain on friendly terms. Action: A simple, brief "Happy Birthday" message could be appropriate. Keep it light and avoid anything emotionally charged.
Scenario 3: You're hoping to get back together (but are unsure of her feelings). Action: Wishing her happy birthday could be a way to open communication, but be prepared for any outcome. Don't put too much pressure on the message. Consider the risk of rejection or misinterpretation.

Ultimately, the decision is yours. Consider what will bring you the most peace and help you move forward in a healthy way.

Wrote answer · 3/14/2025

Karma · 40

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